大闹地府
Trouble in the Underworld
Name: ________________ Date: ________
孙悟空从东海龙王那里得到了金箍棒，花果山热闹得像过年一样。这一天，他请猴子们和朋友们来大吃大喝。酒一碗又一碗，孙悟空喝得醉醺醺的。送走客人以后，他靠在桥边的大树下，呼呼大睡。
睡梦中，他看见两个人走过来，手里拿着一张纸，上面写着“孙悟空”三个字。两人什么也不说，用绳子套住他，拉起来就走。孙悟空迷迷糊糊地跟着他们，一直走到一座城前。他抬头一看，城门上写着三个大字：“幽冥界”。
孙悟空一下子醒了：“幽冥界不是阎王住的地方吗？我来这儿干什么？”那两人说：“你的时间到了，我们是来抓你的。”孙悟空大怒：“我孙悟空早就学过长生不老的本领，阎王管不着我！”他从耳朵里拿出金箍棒，迎风一晃，变得像碗口那么粗，没几下就把两个人打得不能动了。
他拿着金箍棒，一路打进城里。鬼兵们吓得四处乱跑，阎王们连忙出来行礼：“您叫什么名字？”“我是花果山水帘洞的孙悟空！你们竟敢派人来抓我？”阎王们笑着说：“您别生气。叫这个名字的人很多，恐怕是他们抓错了。”
“胡说！把生死簿拿来，我自己查！”生死簿上记录着天下所有生命的寿命。阎王们不敢不给，连忙叫人把那些厚厚的本子都拿了出来。孙悟空找来找去，终于找到了自己的名字：“孙悟空，天生石猴，能活三百四十二岁。”
“只能活三百四十二岁？我才不干！”他拿起笔来，把自己的名字画掉了；又把猴子们的名字，能找到的，统统画掉。然后把本子往地上一扔：“好了好了！从今以后，我们再也不归你们管了！”阎王们站在一边，谁也不敢出声。
孙悟空又一路打出城去，忽然脚下一滑，醒了过来。猴子们正围在他身边：“大王喝了那么多酒，睡了一整夜，怎么还不醒？”孙悟空把梦里的事说了一遍，大家都高兴得又喊又跳。从此，花果山上的很多猴子都不会老，因为生死簿上已经没有了它们的名字。
可是，孙悟空闯下的祸，很快就传到了天上。先是东海龙王来告状，说他抢走了龙宫的宝贝；接着，地府的阎王也来告状，说他打伤了地府的人，还乱改生死簿。玉皇大帝大发脾气：“这妖猴是从哪里来的？派谁去把他抓回来？”
这时，太白金星走上前来：“陛下，不如给他一个小官，把他请到天上来。他要是听话，就好好用他；要是不听，再抓他也不迟。这样不用打仗，事情就能办好。”玉皇大帝一听，觉得很有道理。
孙悟空正想上天看看，便高兴地跟着太白金星来到天宫。玉皇大帝问：“谁是孙悟空？”他也不跪拜，只站着答了一句：“我就是！”大臣们吓了一跳，玉皇大帝却没有怪他，让他当了“弼马温”，管理天上的一千匹天马。孙悟空十分满意，天天照顾这些马，没多久，就把它们养得又肥又高。他一边看着马，一边得意地想：“玉皇大帝给我的这个官，一定不小吧？”他还不知道，这个官到底有多“大”。
Key words
| Word | Pinyin | Meaning |
|---|---|---|
| 猴子 | hóuzi | monkey |
| 靠 | kào | damn; shoot (exclamation) |
| 套 | tào | cover; case; sheath (as in 手套) |
| 抓 | zhuā | to pay close attention to; to take charge of (as in 抓紧) |
| 本领 | bénlǐng | skill; ability |
| 一路 | yílù | all the way; throughout the journey |
| 四处 | sìchù | everywhere; all around |
| 连忙 | liánmáng | hastily; at once |
| 记录 | jìlù | record; notes; minutes; to record; to take down |
| 滑 | huá | slippery; smooth |
| 围 | wéi | to surround; to encircle |
| 传 | chuán | to pass on; to transmit |
English (for the teacher)
Sun Wukong had got the golden-hooped staff from the Dragon King of the East Sea, and Flower Fruit Mountain was as lively as at New Year. That day he invited the monkeys and his friends to a great feast. The wine went round bowl after bowl, and Sun Wukong got thoroughly drunk. After seeing his guests off, he leaned against a big tree by the bridge and fell fast asleep, snoring away.
In his dream he saw two people walking towards him, holding a sheet of paper with three characters on it: "Sun Wukong". Without a word, the two of them looped a rope around him, pulled him up and off they went. Half asleep, Sun Wukong followed them all the way to a walled city. He looked up, and over the city gate were three big characters: "The Dark Realm".
Sun Wukong was wide awake at once: "Isn't the Dark Realm where the King of the Underworld lives? What am I doing here?" The two of them said: "Your time is up. We've come to take you." Sun Wukong flew into a rage: "I, Sun Wukong, learned the art of living forever long ago. The King of the Underworld has no say over me!" He took the golden-hooped staff out of his ear, gave it a shake in the wind, and it grew as thick as a rice bowl; a few blows later, the two of them couldn't move.
Staff in hand, he fought his way into the city. The ghost soldiers ran in all directions in fright, and the Kings of the Underworld hurried out to bow to him: "What is your name, sir?" "I am Sun Wukong of the Water Curtain Cave on Flower Fruit Mountain! How dare you send people to arrest me?" The Kings said with a smile: "Please don't be angry. There are many people with that name; I'm afraid they caught the wrong one."
"Nonsense! Bring me the Book of Life and Death. I'll check it myself!" The Book of Life and Death records the life span of every living thing under heaven. The Kings didn't dare refuse, and quickly had the thick volumes brought out. Sun Wukong searched high and low, and at last he found his own name: "Sun Wukong, a stone monkey born of heaven and earth, may live three hundred and forty-two years."
"Only three hundred and forty-two years? No way!" He picked up a brush and crossed out his own name; then every monkey's name he could find, he crossed out too. Then he threw the book on the ground: "There we are! From now on, we're not yours to rule any more!" The Kings stood to one side, and not one of them dared make a sound.
Sun Wukong fought his way back out of the city, then suddenly his foot slipped, and he woke up. The monkeys were gathered around him: "Your Majesty, you drank so much and slept the whole night. Why won't you wake up?" Sun Wukong told them all about his dream, and they shouted and jumped for joy. From then on, many of the monkeys on Flower Fruit Mountain never grew old, because their names were no longer in the Book of Life and Death.
But the trouble Sun Wukong had caused soon reached heaven. First the Dragon King of the East Sea came to complain that he had stolen the treasure of the Dragon Palace; then the Kings of the Underworld came to complain that he had beaten their people and scribbled all over the Book of Life and Death. The Jade Emperor lost his temper: "Where did this demon monkey come from? Whom shall we send to bring him back?"
Just then the Great White Planet stepped forward: "Your Majesty, why not give him a small post and invite him up to heaven? If he behaves, we make good use of him; if he doesn't, it won't be too late to catch him then. That way there's no need to go to war, and the matter is settled." The Jade Emperor listened and thought it made good sense.
Sun Wukong had been wanting to see heaven anyway, so he happily followed the Great White Planet to the Heavenly Palace. The Jade Emperor asked: "Which one is Sun Wukong?" He didn't kneel or bow; he just stood there and answered: "That's me!" The ministers were shocked, but the Jade Emperor didn't blame him, and made him "Keeper of the Heavenly Horses", in charge of heaven's thousand horses. Sun Wukong was very pleased; he looked after the horses every day, and before long they were fat and tall. As he watched the horses, he thought smugly: "This post the Jade Emperor gave me can't be a small one, can it?" He didn't know yet just how "big" this post really was.